Since I've had this epiphany, I've put it into action. So prepare yourselves. I'm talking fuzzy slippers, roaring fire, and a mug of hot cocoa, because it's story time. Sit back and relax and read this fun and educational story I like to call...
Baby's First Political ABC's
A is for absolutism: the awesome exercise of complete and awesomely unrestricted power in government.
B is for Blagojevich: inspiring story really... you can be a total creep and still get a reality show, even if your political career goes down the tubes. Proof that it's good to keep your options open.
C is for California: lots of votes- keep in mind when choosing a spouse.
D is for Camp David: ka-ching!
E is for electoral college: though they say your vote counts...
F is for filibuster: worked for Mr. Smith, works for you. First rule of politics- you don't need to have anything to say. Just keep talking.
G is for gerrymandering: securing votes by changing electoral boundaries to your advantage.
H is for "Hiking the Appalachian Trail."
I is for impeachment: let us learn from Johnson and Clinton.
J is for juggernaut: a massive, inexorable force that seems to crush anything in its way.
K is for katie courick: she may seem innocent, but she has a dark side. Just ask Sarah Palin.
L is for lobbyist: morality is a tricky thing. So is taking favors.
M is for me: which is what politics are all about.
N is for North Korea and nuclear bombs.
O is for outlays: monetary expenditures. See "P."
P is for presidential perks: limo, airplane, helicopter, house, food, billiards, pools, parties, staff, protection, library, retirement... all this can be yours if the price is right.
Q is for quota: some things take precedence over being qualified.
R is for right wing: pick a side and stick to it, unless of course it becomes unpopular.
S is for speechifying: Can I get an Amen!?
T is for think tank- I always picture those guys with big foreheads.
U is for unaffiliated voter: the underdog's best friend.
V is for vice-president: because everybody needs a scapegoat.
W is for White House: Welcome to Pennsylvania Avenue. We've been expecting you.
X is for politics x: Danger, danger.
Y is for youth of America: they're our future. If only we could get them to pull up their pants.
Z is for zoo (a.k.a. DC): where the politicians live.
Baby's First Political ABC's
A is for absolutism: the awesome exercise of complete and awesomely unrestricted power in government.
B is for Blagojevich: inspiring story really... you can be a total creep and still get a reality show, even if your political career goes down the tubes. Proof that it's good to keep your options open.
C is for California: lots of votes- keep in mind when choosing a spouse.
D is for Camp David: ka-ching!
E is for electoral college: though they say your vote counts...
F is for filibuster: worked for Mr. Smith, works for you. First rule of politics- you don't need to have anything to say. Just keep talking.
G is for gerrymandering: securing votes by changing electoral boundaries to your advantage.
H is for "Hiking the Appalachian Trail."
I is for impeachment: let us learn from Johnson and Clinton.
J is for juggernaut: a massive, inexorable force that seems to crush anything in its way.
K is for katie courick: she may seem innocent, but she has a dark side. Just ask Sarah Palin.
L is for lobbyist: morality is a tricky thing. So is taking favors.
M is for me: which is what politics are all about.
N is for North Korea and nuclear bombs.
O is for outlays: monetary expenditures. See "P."
P is for presidential perks: limo, airplane, helicopter, house, food, billiards, pools, parties, staff, protection, library, retirement... all this can be yours if the price is right.
Q is for quota: some things take precedence over being qualified.
R is for right wing: pick a side and stick to it, unless of course it becomes unpopular.
S is for speechifying: Can I get an Amen!?
T is for think tank- I always picture those guys with big foreheads.
U is for unaffiliated voter: the underdog's best friend.
V is for vice-president: because everybody needs a scapegoat.
W is for White House: Welcome to Pennsylvania Avenue. We've been expecting you.
X is for politics x: Danger, danger.
Y is for youth of America: they're our future. If only we could get them to pull up their pants.
Z is for zoo (a.k.a. DC): where the politicians live.
1 comment:
I think I'm going to have to print off a copy of this for little Sprout. Gotta educate them while they are young!!! (There is nothing quite like when your daughter's first word is gerrymandering. I mean I do live in Washington, right?)
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